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Description
Assume the Worst: The Graduation Speech You'll Never HearThis is Oh, the Places You'll Never Go the ultimate hilarious, cynical, but absolutely realistic view of a college graduate's future. And what he or she can or can't do about it. "This commencement address will never be given, because graduation speakers are supposed to offer encouragement and inspiration. That's not what you need. You need a warning." So begins Carl Hiaasen's attempt to prepare young men and women for their future. And who better to
This is Oh, the Places You'll Never Go--the ultimate hilarious, cynical, but absolutely realistic view of a college graduate's future. And what he or she can or can't do about it. "This commencement address will never be given, because graduation speakers are supposed to offer encouragement and inspiration. That's not what you need. You need a warning."So begins Carl Hiaasen's attempt to prepare young men and women for their future. And who better to warn them about their precarious paths forward than Carl Hiaasen? The answer, after reading Assume the Worst, is: Nobody.
And who better to illustrate--and with those illustrations, expand upon and cement Hiaasen's cynical point of view--than Roz Chast, best-selling author/illustrator and National Book Award winner? The answer again is easy: Nobody.
Following the format of Anna Quindlen's commencement address (Being Perfect) and George Saunders's commencement address (Congratulations, by the way), the collaboration of Hiaasen and Chast might look typical from the outside, but inside it is anything but.
This book is bound to be a classic, sold year after year come graduation time. Although it's also a good gift for anyone starting a job, getting married, or recently released from prison. Because it is not just funny. It is, in its own Hiaasen way, extremely wise and even hopeful. Well, it might not be full of hope, but there are certainly enough slivers of the stuff in there to more than keep us all going.
Binding Type: Hardcover
Publisher: Knopf Publishing Group
Published: 04/10/2018
ISBN: 9780525655015
Pages: 64
Weight: 0.35lbs
Size: 7.10h x 5.10w x 0.70d
Review Citations: Kirkus Reviews 01/01/0001
Voice of Youth Advocates 08/01/2018 - Recommended - Hard To Beat
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4.1 ★★★★★
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Product Reviews
★★★★★ 4
Longer Lasting than most things I've tried
Size: 1 Count (Pack of 16)
I bought these to go on the PetSafe Bouncy Bone which I had bought for my Australian Shepherd/Vizsla mix puppy who chews everything. We had gone through so many "long-lasting" chew toys/bones that really lasted only about 10 minutes and I was looking for something to occupy his time a little longer. These do the trick. Although they still don't last super long, they take a little more effort and keep him distracted a bit longer than anything else edible that I've tried. To me they are a bit pricey, so I try to make them last by only putting one on at a time, instead of one on each end of the toy. I also tighten the ends pretty tight to make it more difficult for him to get at the entire ring. If you don't mind the price, these are an easy and convenient way to keep your dog busy.
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Reviewed in the United States on June 29, 2015
★★★★★ 5
Dog treats
Size: 1 Count (Pack of 16)
Keeping our granddog busy and teeth clean
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Reviewed in the United States on December 8, 2025
★★★★★ 5
Keeps pet busy
Size: 1 Count (Pack of 16)
Must have for Busy Buddy Bones. Keeps them busy. Durable and must taste great. I keep these on my subscribe and save. I have never noticed any smell or mess with these, unlike some other rawhides.
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Reviewed in the United States on July 21, 2024
★★★★★ 5
PetSafe Busy Buddy Refill Ring Dog Treats
Size: 1 Count (Pack of 16)
Great! My Baby Pearl Anne loves them. And, she won't normally play with anything else. The Vet says it's due her being in a HORRIBLE Puppy Mill. She never had a puppyhood. She is still Neurotic, even after having been her parent for over 4 years. I would definitely like to get my hands on these people, if I knew who they were. She was found her on a VERY busy intersection way up north in the Texas town where I live.
I don't normally go in this neighborhood, so I didn't see her on the street. My best friend, who died just 4 years ago on the 18th of March, had a ex coworker. Leslie(my best friend),KNEW I wanted a dog. I fell in love with her dog: a Miniature Schnauzer. One day Leslie's coworker called her. She said they had found a dog on the street. The coworker said that she couldn't keep anymore dogs. She has 3. So, when they described her, I knew I wanted her! She's a rare pure white Miniature Schnauzer. She was skinny, shaking, with horribly matted hair. She was scared to death, and freezing to death. I put her in a towel, and took her the Vet. And, she said she had worms, was dehydrated, and malnourished. not anymore. She's my baby, my child. Who is now spoiled to death.
Sorry this is so long, but, I really needed to tell her story.
Donna Valentine-Jones.
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Reviewed in the United States on March 24, 2015
★★★★★ 3
Sometimes they arrive chewy and great, other times stale and hard as a rock!
Size: 1 Count (Pack of 16)
My dog loves these added to her toys, but alot of time they arrive hard as a rock.
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Reviewed in the United States on December 26, 2025